We arrived safely in London. Mr Frazer met us at the train station. I hadn't realised how much I had missed him... it was all I could do to give him a chaste kiss and squeeze his hand. I hate to say how much I wanted to...well. His look in return was eloquent.

He told me that Sir Sebastian had heard of our engagement, and had given him leave to "take whatever time he needed" to attend to matters. What a relief to know that our arrangement has been sanctioned by Mr Frazer's superiors. I should hate to have to make a scene.

When we returned to the house at Charles Street, I found an enormous stack of mail from my family. Everyone short of the cat had to write to give an opinion on my plans.

I opened my Father's letter first, and found it as warm and kind as I had hoped. Then I opened Mary's letter, and thus learned that even my Mother was happy for the match. Mother's own letter even went so far as to suggest that I needn't wait for them to meet Mr Frazer, that I should marry him right away. Imagine!

Since Mr Frazer has been given leave, we are making arrangements to go to Bridgwater right away. Miss Whitnell has kindly agreed to accompany us.

Now I must complete my unpacking, then re-pack my things for another trip.

Tuesday, 16 August

Today I wired to Bridgwater and made arrangements for our visit. We'll be leaving tomorrow, when Sir Cosmo and the rest are leaving for Edenfield Court and then Goxhill. I have requested two rooms at the Blake's Flag, hoping that Mr Davies will be able to accommodate us. We are planning to stay until 24 August, when we will travel to visit Miss Whitnell's cottage in West Darlson, and then on to Goxhill to rejoin Sir Cosmo and the others.

I have all the gifts I purchased in Berlin and Naples and Paris ready to bring to my family. I have only to make sure all the clothes I took to the Continent are freshly cleaned and mended, and re-park the lot.

I confess to being nervous about introducing my Intended to the family. I suppose that's only natural. I rather wish that we had a little more in the way of plans. Mr Frazer has not indicated any particular ideas to me.

Thursday, 17 August

I am very pleased with the reception we have received from my family. Mr Frazer is already very popular with my nieces. My mother and sisters have been very gracious to Miss Whitnell. The whole of it seems somewhat too good to be true.

Even Turgenov has been adopted. My sister Helen looked aghast when little Minerva pulled his ear, but he only blinked, then licked her hand. Now Minerva is his loyal friend.

We have been entertained mainly at Mary and Edward's home, for tea and dinner and all points between. My brother Mr Davies met us at the station yesterday, sent our luggage on to the Inn, and took us directly to the House.

So, after another day of concentrated socializing today, we have returned to the Inn for a few quiet moments.

Saturday will see us at my Uncle Radcliffe Sinclair's house, where the entire family will gather for a dinner in honor of my engagement. I don't expect it will be too extravagant, since much of the family is still in Mourning for cousin Matthew.

I would find it rather embarrassing to have too much made of it. I know that many of my relations are proclaiming my finding a match as a near-miracle. It's one thing for me to think of it so, but it's not pleasant to imagine all my aunts clucking over it as a nine-days-wonder.

Friday, 18 August

Mr Frazer spent part of today closeted with my Father in the offices. I suppose they were discussing financial concerns. I am surprised at myself that I am not insistent about hearing the results of the discussion. I am normally such a practical person, and yet I find it uncomfortable to think about them talking about me and my future in terms of money.

If they don't come and tell me what they have in mind, I will probably have to bring myself to ask.

Perhaps they were talking about something else altogether. Perhaps my father was simply trying to give Benton fair warning about my temper and willfulness.

Miss Whitnell, Mr Frazer and I went riding today, using horses borrowed from the Davies' livery stable. The first horse the hostler gave Miss Whitnell was terribly afraid of Turgenov, and we had to choose another, one with more experience around different dogs, before we could go anywhere.

(Later)

At least one topic of discussion between my Father and my Intended seems to have been the schedule for the actual marriage. Benton said, somewhat indirectly, that my father had suggested an "earliest possible" sort of time.

I wonder, now, if my Father is hoping that we will just marry privately, before the Registrar, and save the family the expense of a wedding. Well, whatever we do will be modest, in keeping with our ages and positions. I don't expect any extravagance! But, I am sure that our friends, who have worked hard to bring Mr Frazer and myself together, would be disappointed if we didn't celebrate our happiness in their company. So, some sense of Occasion will be essential. This then brings us back to the matter of waiting until Sir Cosmo and Miss Chigwidgeon have had their own Occasion.

Mr Frazer said he told my Father all about this reason for waiting. I can't quite tell if Mr Frazer thinks this is a good reason, or if he is only deferring to my wishes.

While we had a quiet moment, I asked him if he had given any thought to where we would live. I was surprised to learn that he owns a family home in Sudbury. As it is too far from Town to be convenient to him in his work, he has let it and he lives in rooms closer to the Metropolitan Police Headquarters.

I also asked him directly if he would object to my continuing my work, both in tutoring Edward, and in working with the League. He declared that, as he was sure I would be unhappy without this work, I should continue.

Saturday, 20 August

The family party was not too onerous, largely thanks to Miss Whitnell. She somehow managed to keep various family members talking to her, so that Mr Frazer and I could sit together and converse with one or two relatives at a time.

He seemed a bit nervous at the beginning of the evening (I was rather nervous myself). As the evening progressed, I overheard mostly kind remarks about Mr Frazer, and he seemed to relax in the general approbation.

Sunday, 21 August

We all went to services with my Family. I received a great clamour of congratulations. Mr Frazer was the object of many admiring glances from the unmarried young ladies of the parish. Indeed, I intercepted some surreptitious glances from some of the married ladies, as well. I heard quite a few whispered conversations expressing disbelief at my luck. Mr Frazer was very attentive to me. I did my best to ignore the whisperers, and tried not to smirk at them.

In the later afternoon, my Father called me in to his office, where he summarised his discussions with Mr Frazer about our financial future. He expressed some surprise at the amount Mr Frazer has managed to save from his salary and the income from renting his Sudbury house. He also has a modest annuity which he has let compound for some time to make a rather respectable annuity.

I am reassured that we will have something to survive on if we need it.

I also asked Father to draw up a document to allow me to retain control of any income derived from publication of my Naturalist papers, and furthermore to protect my future husband from financial or legal responsibility for any liabilities or lawsuits emerging from those same works. I can't guess what will happen regarding my past or future scientific works, for good or for ill.

Monday, 22 August

Father talked over various financial arrangements with Mr Frazer and myself. We had a few amendments and further ideas. For the most part, we seem to be in accord. I feel much better for having some idea of where we stand. Father says he will have the documents ready within the week, so we will be free to sign them whenever it is convenient (another little nudge for an early date, I'd say)

Mr Frazer and Miss Whitnell and my Mother and my sisters and my eldest niece Charlotte took a lengthy stroll around the town today. It's a wonder that Mr Frazer wasn't deafened by the chatter, being the only gander in the flock of geese. He didn't seem to discomfited, though. My niece Lenore was definitely put out at being left behind. I will have to think of some way to make it up to her.

We met Mrs Berringer and her daughter in the street. My Mother introduced Mr Frazer. Mother was positively purring, while Mrs Berringer simpered and Janet Berringer stood with her mouth agape.

(Later)

Lenore has forgiven us. I told her that I would help her practice her French, and asked Mr Frazer to join us. She so dotes on him that an hour in his company, without the other girls, smoothed away all her scowls. She also at last had an opportunity to practice formal modes of address and use of masculine pronouns.

Tuesday, 23 August

I had a surprise this evening. All the family–parents, sisters, brothers-in-law and nieces, all came together for dinner at the house. After dinner, we were sitting in the little Parlour My brothers Edward and Gerald came in with a chest–the dower chest that I had laboured to fill when I was a girl. All the gentlemen then went out–my brothers cajoling Mr Frazer out with them.

I was bracing myself for some awkwardness, as I have steadily emptied that chest for the past several years, giving the contents to my sisters and their families. There was no sense in all those linen goods mouldering away unused, after all. I was sure that I would never marry.

But the faces of my sisters as they urged me to open it suggested that something was afoot.

Sure enough, all of the things that I had given them all these years, which they had received with evident pleasure, were all back in the chest–unused. They had simply turned around an put them back into the chest when I wasn't there. With one exception–Mary begged my pardon because she couldn't part with the runner I had embroidered with vines and willow leaves–I had given it to her on her 9th wedding anniversary, and she loved it too much to give it back into the chest.

To sweeten the moment, there were additional little pieces of work from each of the girls–even little Minerva had worked a little tidy-bag with a ribbon to tie it.

To crown it all, laid delicately atop the rest was a length of very fine net with lace edging and embroidery. I recognised it at once as the veil worn by my Mother and both of my sisters.

What touched me most in all this was the knowledge that even after I had resolved to accept a spinster's life, my family had never given up on me finding the right match.
Miss Whitnell, when told the whole tale of the refilling of the chest, went quite watery. Even I nearly cried.

Wednesday 24 August

Today we had a very long journey by rail and carriage, all the way to West Darlson, where we are
looking in at Miss Whitnell's cottage. I have heard a few stories of the oddities of this cottage. So far it seems mostly normal, except that it doesn't seem as musty or abandoned as cottages seem to when left unoccupied for so long. There is no sign of vermin, no leaks in the roof, not even much dust.

It is late, and I can't stay up writing, as I am sharing Miss Whitnell's room, and she is ready to sleep.

Thursday, 25 August

We all rose early. Mr Frazer (and Turgenov) rose Very Early, went out for exercise, brought in water, and started the fires. We all took a short walk, just to get the lay of the land. Then we returned to the cottage and prepared breakfast. It was very congenial to prepare food with two people so dear to me. I think Mr Frazer is actually the better cook among the three of us.

Miss Whitnell and I did our Exercises, though without any sparring. It was difficult to resume, after so many days in Bridgwater with no sufficiently private area for practice.

We had a very pleasant day out in the countryside, doing nothing in particular. We made up a picnic lunch and went on a long leisurely ramble. It is so blessedly quiet out here! Only three people, and one dog. No carts, no dustbins, no shrieking nieces, no clucking mother, no pounding, no rockets... We came alongside a field and watched the men at work. I could hear the buzzing of grasshoppers and bees.

We sat on some stones by a brook to eat our bread and cheese, and we could see the brown speckled fishes among the eddies. Turgenov started some grouse, and they whirred loudly past my head.

Friday, 26 August

Today, after our exercises and breakfast, Miss Whitnell had made arrangements to go in to Stoke-on-Trent. We all went together, and there I helped Miss Whitnell purchase dry goods and supplies for her cottage, and Mr Frazer stopped in at the telegraph office.

After we returned from our outing, I went outside to do a watercolour of the prettiest view. Landscapes are not my strength, but it was not at all bad, and I presented it to Miss Whitnell.

Miss Whitnell has been so kind. While we were in town today, and Mr Frazer was off seeing to his messages, she mentioned that Mr Frazer and I could use this cottage if we wished to take our honeymoon here. How thoughtful! I am not sure if we will be able to take a honeymoon, but I may mention the offer to Mr Frazer and see what he says.

Saturday, 27 August

We left West Darlson and arrived at Goxhill today. The Manor and grounds are quite lovely. The gardens are not overdone, as is so often the problem with these extensive places. There is a great deal of land left nearly wild.

Lord Greyminster has welcomed us so very warmly. Miss Pinker, of course, is the soul of hospitality.

I had a strange moment when I met Lord Greyminster's butler. He is the brother of Sir Cosmo's Graves, and looks so closely like him, I could scarcely tell the difference at first glance. They use different types of shoe polish, though, and the one used by our Graves has an almost smoky odour, so I can usually tell which one is coming up behind me.

Miss Whitnell is very pleased with the prospect of riding often during our visit. There is a horse farm on a neighboring estate, and Lord Greyminster assures us that the owners are eager to have our help in exercising their animals.

Another very fine feature of this estate is an old, disused smithy, which Lord Greyminster has offered for Edward's use during our stay. It is just far enough from the house that the noise of his work is not so deafening. I am not quite sure about what he is making. He told me that it was a present for someone and would say no more in the house. He said he would show it to me later.

In addition to that mysterious project, Edward has come to me with a scheme for learning Arabic. He showed me a collection of antique books in Lord Greyminster's library, allegedly brought back from the Crusades! He is very eager to examine them, and I am happy to see him interested in some quiet, scholarly pursuit for a change. I think that Mr Frazer may understand Arabic, so I am hoping he can get us started with this study.
I have written up a proposed curriculum for Edward (and for George) for the next while, which I hope to review with Sir Cosmo and Edward tomorrow.

Sunday, 28 August

Today I met with Sir Cosmo. The first topic I addressed was my wish to continue working as Edward's tutor after my marriage. He expressed relief that I would not be leaving, which was very gratifying.

We then reviewed my proposed curriculum, including the newly-added Arabic practice. Sir Cosmo had some suggestions, which I have incorporated.

I had a pleasant visit with Miss Chigwidgeon this afternoon. I told her all about my visit with my family, how they seemed to like Mr Frazer, and how my Mother has been after me to marry as soon as possible. I hastened to assure her that I had no intention of usurping her precedence. She looked at me rather strangely.

She told me in return about getting to know Sir Cosmo's Grandfather and Cousin better, told some amusing stories about the confusion caused by the two Graves, and expressed some annoyance at being perpetually addressed as "my Lady."

Mr Frazer gave Edward and me a lesson in the basics of Arabic script today. I can tell that Edward and I have our work cut out for us.

Monday, 29 August 1870

Today I sent copies of my Moth paper to two Naturalists who live in the area of Goxhill. Sir Thomas Rossiter, a noted expert on beetles, lives just three miles from here. Sir Charles Fernly is reportedly a rather reclusive fellow, but he lives quite near at Goxhill Grange.

I was still a bit sore from yesterday's Defence practice, but I endured this morning's as best I could, and tried not to be slack. It's amazing how quickly I get out of form. We all did a bit more practice in silent movement as well.

Edward and I spent two hours doing Latin today, followed by an expedition to one of the ponds to look at and draw the insects and plants we found there. We found a fine array of Dragonfly and damselfly nymphs and imagos. I caught some to send back to M Lheureux, as promised.

In the later afternoon, I went riding with Miss Whitnell and Mr Frazer. It was somewhat warm, but we stayed mainly to the fringes of the woods, keeping to the shade. Miss Whitnell is a very courageous rider. She jumped over a few streams which I was far too cautious to attempt, especially on an unfamiliar horse. But then, Miss Whitnell has much more riding experience than I have. We came back a little late for tea.

Tuesday, 30 August 1870

Defence exercises are still a challenge today, especially after yesterday's long ride. I did notice, though, that I felt better after exercises than I did when I awoke.

After today's lessons with Edward (Mathematics and more Arabic with Mr Frazer), I received Lord Greyminster's kind permission to do some target shooting with my pistol. I will have to try to get regular practice while we are out in the country with a nice range to work in.

During the afternoon, we had a picnic an the shores of the large lake. I sketched some of the waterfowl. Emily nearly had a fit when Edward went wading in the shallow water. I had to send her off and watch over him myself until he was ready to come ashore. Of course, I wouldn't have been any help if Edward were drowning, but I doubted the likelihood of any such mishap. Mr Frazer was with us too, and he said he can swim. He seemed surprised that I had never learned, and thought I was joking when I said that swimming is not generally part of the repertoire of ladylike accomplishments.

Wednesday 31 August 1870

Today Mr Frazer departed to London. He has duties to attend to, after all. His superiors have been very generous in giving him so much time. I don't expect to see him again until we return to London...probably in the later part of September. At least I can write to him.

It is rather a shame he can't stay one more day. Lord Greyminster is holding an outdoor dance tomorrow evening. I should dearly love an opportunity to dance with my Intended.

I have been catching up on the news of the past several days. The peace seems to be settling on the Continent. I imagine that France and Prussia are going to keep their heads down for a while, if only to ensure that England doesn't send us back for another little holiday.

From what I hear, matters in Canada are becoming more troubling. The news reports hint at some rather uncanny occurrences, which suggests that our League may be deployed there at some coming time. I suppose it will be interesting to visit North America, but I am a little weary of all this travel. And what if we are sent without Mr Frazer? Or what if he is sent without me? I'd be very annoyed.

We received a visit from Lady Rossiter of Wassand Manor. She made a point to thank me, on behalf of Sir Thomas, for sending my paper. She invited me, along with Edward, to call on Friday. I am very pleased, and looking forward to meeting Sir Thomas. All his works I have seen have been very carefully researched and were very detailed.

It turns out that Edward has been there already, with Sir Cosmo, last week. He tells me that Sir Thomas's insect collection is extensive.

Thursday, 1 September 1870

The outdoor party was enjoyable. Lord Greyminster had invited all the neighbourhood, including all the tenants and labourers. We had several country dances, which were undertaken with great verve by skilled and gauche dancers alike. All the jostle and laughing was much more fun than I would have expected.

Friday, 2 September 1870

Today Edward and I walked the three miles to Wassand Manor. Of course, Lord Greyminster offered a carriage, but I thought that a little exercise would use up some of Edward's excess energy.

The Rossiter home is fairly grand, and it's plain that the family has been in residence for quite some generations.

Sir Thomas was very interesting in many ways. He does have a bit of a mania for beetles. Since I am not nearly so familiar with beetles as with lepidopterae, I allowed him to show me the prizes of his collection (which is Quite Extensive).

I found Sir Thomas's person even more interesting. He bore an astonishing resemblance to the late Jerrold Moriarty, and indeed to the handful of other Moriarties I have seen. Several of the family portraits I noticed bore similar features. Sir Thomas did not, however, have the attenuated fingers, only the general build and the distinctive skull shape. It gave me pause, especially once I had observed his compulsive temperament. Fortunately, he didn't show any tendency to megalomania, occult observances, or general crime while I was his guest.

(Letter to Benton Frazer)

Wednesday, 7 September, 1870
Goxhill Manor

Dearest Benton,
I hope you are keeping well there in Town. I know that you have lived perfectly comfortably on your own (well, along with Turgenov, of course) for many years, but somehow, I feel that I should be there looking after you.

All of us here have been busy. We are continuing our exercises every day. I have gone riding with Miss Whitnell and Miss Chigwidgeon most days. I have been practicing with my pistol, and I daresay my accuracy is improving. I've done a little shooting with my bow, as well.

My work with Edward is settling into a fairly reliable routine. We have particular subjects we cover each day, with a certain amount of time spent on whatever project catches our fancy. Edward has been enjoying the use of the old smithy on the grounds. I hope you will be pleased with our progress in Arabic. We have been concentrating on phonetic reading using the books in Lord Greyminster's library. Our vocabulary is expanding, but I'm sure our grasp of the grammar is woefully lacking.

Lord Greyminster continues to throw all manner of parties and outings. We had an outdoor dance last Thursday, which was great fun, but for the fact that I wished you were here with us.

We have gone to Hornsea to visit the library there. We also went to the seaside there. I examined various tidepools full of crabs and invertebrate creatures, and soaked the hems of even my shorter skirts.

I have met Sir Thomas Rossiter, and he is very interesting. I mentioned the upcoming reading of the Moth paper, and he said he might come to Town for it. I also received a kind note with insightful comments from Sir Charles Fernly, but I don't expect an invitation from that quarter.

I have sent an inquiry to the printers I have used for previous papers. If I receive a good response to the reading, I hope to have some modest number of copies of the Moth Paper printed. I am quite weary of producing manuscript copies. I would also like to have the illustrations reproduced properly, instead of the necessarily simplified tracings that have accompanied the manuscript copies.

I hope that your work has not gone too astray in the long time that we were on the Continent, and our subsequent ramblings. I imagine that all that filing and all that evidence gets up to all sorts of trouble if you are not there to watch it.

I understand that we are to return to Town in a week and a half, since Sir Cosmo cannot leave his affairs unattended indefinitely. I look forward to seeing you and hearing all about what you have been doing.

Give my regards to Turgenov.

With all affection,
Ruth

Proceed to Mother seemed vaguely troubled

Return to Miss Sinclair's Diary Index

Return to Main Menu

Contents this page copyright 2004 by Ieva Ohaks. All Rights Reserved.