"You want to hear that old story? That was a very strange summer, very strange indeed. Humans were talkin' war. The city was fillin' up with folks from the country side, 'fraid o' the Prussians, who were massin' on the border.

"That's mil'try talk for gatherin' your soldiers an' weapons and such on the patch o' your ground that's closest to your neighbor's ground, just prior to rushin' in and causin' as much mayhem an' death as y'can. War isn't like a fair fight, one against another and may the the toughest yob win. No, it's about destroyin' as much o' the other guy's stuff an' people as you can, and who cares if the wimmin and children get caught in the middle. It's all part o' the price.

"Anyway, things were tense, an our witch, a lovely and bright girl by the name o' Elinore, she was worried, because her mum and dad were worried. Her dad was some sort o' diplomat for Britain, who wasn't supposed to be involved in the war, on account o' officially bein' allies with both the Prussians and the French, but there was Elinore's family stuck in a city right in the likely path o' the fightin'.

"Her gran'mama, who was a very powerful witch, arrived with a lot of other witches and their servants and such. I had never seen such a gatherin' of witches in all my long years! Oh, yes! There were big witches, an' little witches, and some very odd witches indeed!

"First, Gran'mama Cuthbert seemed a right proper witch, dressin' in green. That's a good witchin' colour. Black is traditional, I know, but green runs a close second. She had the Second Sight, like our own Elinore, an' she could converse with spirits, and make 'em do things as she commanded. She also had the power of healin'. Then there was Miss Whitnell, she also was a proper witch, dressed all in black. She had a trunk full of witchin' things the like o' which you can't imagine! Bottles full o' potions, and all the things you'd need to mix up more, plus musty old books that practically hummed with the power o' the witches who had passed it down, one gen'ration to the next for who knows how long!

"There was also The Edward -- she was a very crafty witch. Disguised herself as a little boy, she did. Looked almost sweet and harmless. The jacks and the rubber ball were an especially nice touch, I thought. All her coats and things had these magick pockets she could reach into and pull out anythin' that she could imagine. She had a familiar in the form of a small dog who she talked with quite often. For a time we suspected she might be the Big Witch In Charge, because she had the cleverest disguise, an' she could build infernal devices. Especially after she made that potion that sobered me up with a single drink! But we saw Miss Sinclair scoldin' her and orderin' her about several times. Miss Sinclair was one o' the witches we had trouble figgerin' out. She was definitely a witch -- normal humans don't have auras like that, no indeed! --but she didn't do much witchin' where we could see it. But she could order The Edward around without gettin' turned into a toad, so she had to be quite powerful, too. She liked to draw things, pictures of flowers an' stuff. She drew a right pretty sketch o' Birdseye, she did. She almost never touched any food, and she could hear quite things you wouldn't expect even a fairy dog to hear.

"I know that those four sound like a right huge host o' witches, but they weren't the half of it! There was Miss Chig-whatsit, who was older than The Edward, but younger than the other three. She didn't dress in the usual witchin' colours, but she had long black hair that was as dark as the darkest night in the bottom o' a cave. She helped some o' the others with the witchin' when it was needed. She could break things just by lookin' at them! That can be a very useful trick, let me tell you!

"Another witch went by the name o' Metz Ger an' she was in a family way. She spent much o' her time goin' through her books, castin' runes, and other such things, none o' the strenuous kind o' witchin' at all, but very determined.

"Finally there was Emily. She was one o' the truly rarest o' witches who get along really well with steel and iron. Lots o' witches have to avoid iron on account o' it messes with their magicks, but Emily had weapons o' steel, iron, and other metals hidden about her person. Her clothes had some magick like The Edward's did, 'cuss she could pull more weapons out o' them than could have possibly fit in a pocket!

"The unusual thing about these witches were that they were travelin' with a bunch o' wizards. Now wizards an' witches don't always get along. They say, in the old stories, it's on account o' the fact that witches have more powers than wizards. I don't know if that's true, because some o' these wizards could do some things even the witches couldn't do! One o' the wizards was called Cosmo; he carried strange magick things in his pockets. He could shoot fire from his cane an' make things he points at blow up. Then there was Doc Willie. He blew up lots o' things, an' a couple times he created a fireball, hitched a rope to it, and flew through the air pretty as you please! He was bein' guarded by a giant! The giant was a very nice man who gave us a nice bottle o' whisky the first night he arrived. There was also a wizard called Ramsay. He was a typical wizard, with a cane instead o' a staff, but wizards haven't been goin' in for staffs the last few centuries, have they? An he travelled with the usual candles and bells and witchin' things. We also saw him helpin' the witches with their witchin'.

"There were two wizards who were similar, yet different. They had darker skin the most o' the others, and sometimes they talked together in a secret wizardin' language. They could change into shadows and move about the house without bein' seen. The older one, the others all called him Salamander or somethin' like that, he never slept. The younger one was called George, and was Salamander's apprentice. He also spent a lot o' time with The Edward.

"There was another wizard, the others called him Hoss On or some such, who was also very dark skinned. He spun and danced and said long, song-like incantations several times a day. He was the keeper o' the Lion--this was some sort o' demon or djinn that had been impressed in the form of a statue of a lion carved from the world's biggest hunk o' amber. It could be made to do all sorts of magicks, an' it was blindin' to look at. Hoss On could talk to the Lion and make it answer him.

"Another o' the wizards was called Henri. He had the worst disguise. He was tryin' to pass himself off as a French aristo, an' the accent was a dead give-away that he wasn't. He must have been one o' them all-chemmie wizards, because he set up a room in the basement and started mixin all these strange potions together. He locked up the room so tight even we had trouble seein' inside it. He unwound some kind of ribbon out o' is wizardin' gadgets and dipped it in the potions. Then he dipped paper in the potions, too, and would flash a light at the papers, then a picture would appear. It would fade into sight just like a ghost. He could also make these loud, flashy explosions that usually didn't set anythin' on fire.

"There were two wizards, MacGregor and Frazer, we didn't realize were wizards when they first arrived. But then we saw both o' them talkin' to ghosts later, and one o' them talked to his dog and understood when the dog answered, so we realized the dog was his familiar. We never figured out if Uncle Cuthbert was a wizard or not. He was related to both Gran'mama Cuthbert an' our Elinore, so he may have been. He slept a lot, though he was very generous the first night and shared some very fine brandy on the first night. We also weren't sure about Deveril. There was somethin' very odd about his aura, and he did some odd things, but nothin' we could be sure was wizardin'.

"They arrived in the middle o' the night, wakin' the whole household, though our Elinore had tried to warn her mum and dad and the others that Gran'mama Cuthbert was on her way. They got settled in, an' as I mentioned, a few o' them were right generous that night.

"The next day, after eatin' breakfast and spendin' a lot of time doin' strange, witchy things, they left the house split into three groups. One went to the docks to meet a friend, another went to see the town, and the third went to meet the Emporer. Oh, didn't I mention that bit? The Emporer was in the city, on account o' the war about to start.

"Anyways, while they were out Things Happened. Somehow they got into a fight with some other wizards who had their own giant and a big zombie creature. They had to destroy a whole church to put a stop to it. The soldiers weren't too happy with them, probably because o' the church, and hauled them away. Our Elinore heard about them bein' in trouble, and she put together a magick paper an' asked us to deliver it to Gran'mama Cuthbert. Foxglove and Birdseye got the message to her, then brought one back that didn't seem to soothe Elinore's fears much, but she said Gran'mama said they were safe. And later that night they did all come home, havin' settled things with the soldiers.

"They did some more witchin' that night, puttin' up a more powerful spell on the house. Made it hard for even us to go any further into the place than the nursery. But we could keep a watch over Elinore and her brother, Georgie, and Amelie, so Peony said we shouldn't raise a fuss.

"Then It arrived. At first it felt like one o' those big faeries, the kinds that hang out with the King and Queen an' go on quests an' the like. But it wasn't. It was all fire and anger and power. Similar to the demon imprisoned in Hoss On's lion, though the Lion doesn't seem to be angry. It had a shape to its aura that sometimes was like a Prussian soldier, sometimes like an elf, and other times was more like a small thunderstorm, but made of fire instead o' clouds.

"It wanted into the house, but couldn't get past the barriers the witches had put up. Peony an' the others were quite concerned, because it was intent on harming someone. I figured if it was lookin' for a fight, then it had come to the right place. Peony stopped me from jumpin' him and head-buttin' him into next Thursdee, because he would put up a fight and might bring the house down on Elinore and Georgie before I got 'im sorted out.

"So I followed him 'round the grounds, so I could be there if he found a way to break through. If he broke into the house, I'd be within my rights to throw him back out, right? Well, he tried an' he tried to get in. First at the window o' Miss Whitnell's room. Then he tried several other doors and windows. He even hurled himself at the roof and the walls a few times, but the witches' barrier held him out. He kept comin' back to Miss Whitnell's room and tearin' at the barrier, like he thought he could dig through it.

"He battered against the barrier half the night. Finally, all exhausted, he slunk over to the window o' MacGregor's room an' he sent his 'fluence into the room. His 'fluence whispered into MacGregor's dreams. But he couldn't actually touch MacGregor, an' he couldn't work magick in the room, other than to whisper in MacGregor's dreams.

"An' that's all he did that night. He finally left. So, in the mornin' Peony went off to consult with Azalea an' Lily an' some o' the other faeries in the other gardens. When she came back, she said none o' the others knew what this thing was, either, but it was big and dangerous. It was obvious we needed to tell the witches what was happenin', but which one? Witches can be terribly persnickety about doin' things the proper way! You should have heard this lot arguin' about what to do after we told them! We needed to know which one was the Big Witch In Charge to make the report all proper. Foxglove suggested we ask The Edward, since she wanted to talk with us and wasn't the Big Witch In Charge. They couldn't very well get angry at us for askin' a junior witch which witch was in charge, could they?

"The Edward fetched Miss Whitnell, who fetched most o' the others. Well, actually, I do think that several o' the others were in the garden before Foxglove talked to The Edward, but they all got there an' Peony, Birdseye, an' Foxglove tried to explain what had happened, then Peony called me over and had me tell what I had seen while watchin' the Thing Tryin' to Get In. I was explainin' everythin' as best I could, an' I thought doin' a pretty good job o' it, but they kept askin' their questions an' I was gettin' a touch parched.

"The Edward offered me a drink, a good-sized drink in one of those fancy cut crystals the humans like. I was more than just a touch parched, so I downed it all in a single gulp. I should have known better than to drink somethin' offered to me by such a sneaky witch, at least without askin' what it was, first. Describe it? Oh, well, I'll try. Imagine that you're a bucket o' water, see, then imagine that someone pours you onto a big, hot fire that's been stoked up until it'll melt iron. That's what it felt like, except less pleasant. My eye balls left their sockets and flew around the city, bouncin' off the buildin's before comin' back, and they'd gotten themselvs coated with red hot cinders while they was gone.

"When I came to my senses everythin' had changed. Before I drank the potion, the world had been soft and warm and squishy, like a soft pillow by the fire. After I drank the potion, everythin' was hard and stark and bright and did I mention hard?

"By that time the witches and wizards were arguin' between themselves about what best to do. Some of them wanted to lay a trap, lure The Thing into it, and knock him out of this world and the last world and the next world for good measure. The others wanted to do that, too, but they wanted to do it Right Now but Not Now and Not Here and Not There and they didn't really sound like they knew what they wanted to do, only that they wanted to do it very badly.

"They decided to consult with some other witches, and they needed someone to take a message. I wish I could say I volunteered first, but I was havin' such a hard time thinkin'. It's not easy to understand big folks' talk when their words are all rigid and full-size. I'd gotten quite used to the world when it was squishy, and wasn't sure I liked the way everythin' was after the potion. Except that I also knew that no matter what the visitin' witches decided, my place was with My Witch, our Elinore. So when I realized that Birdseye had volunteered before I did, I decided it was okay. I had important work to do…

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